something I don't like

Like most young evangelical Christians growing up, I often heard the phrase: "God doesn't give you more than you can handle."

First, I hate this. Second, I hate this. And third, well... you get the point.

Why do I hate it, you may ask? 

After I got over my seething hatred, I realized the reason why I disliked it so much. This saying burrows GUILT into its receiver. We get the message: "you've been given what you can handle by GOD. Who knows you so well.... but wait. You still think it's too much? Are you second-guessing God?"

The young Christian quivers, questioning themselves and feeling oppressed by His sovereignty in knowing how much we can handle. But I don't think I can handle it so...

Also, I think it's COMPLETELY MISSING THE POINT. I think the original writer of this phrase had good intentions. Yes, we are God's creation and He IS sovereign. He knows. And maybe we are a little more equipped than we give ourselves credit. But at the end of the day, with this phrase, it makes me feel so unknown by God. He's like an assembly line chute that dumps a lot on me without any knowledge of my small arms and hands that can barely reach.

I think the better way of putting it is - sometimes, God gives us more than we can handle so that we can learn to rely on him. 

Definitely not as pithy or catchphrase-y. But I think it's a more sound theology AND it allows us to see who we are and who God is in a more accurate way. We were made weak in order to see and need God's strength. 

That is about a 180 degree difference from what I want, from what the culture says, from what is applauded, etc. After all, I'm a grown-ass woman and I want to be able to do EVERYTHING. 

But no. If there's anything I've learned, it's that we need constant rehabilitation. We need to stop trying so dang hard to stop being lonely, to stop feeling bad, to stop feeling less than. 

Let him begin the rehabilitation process today. And just like any rehab...it takes time. It hurts, it's painful, it takes practice, and you'll most likely make mistakes and fall back into old patterns. BUT IT'S OKAY. 

We were made to need him more.

current state of affairs

Disclaimer: this post is highly opinionated and may be a little rant-y. Please continue.

For whatever reason, this article made me really sad. I ran across the blurb on people.com and the opinions of Ms. Cameron Diaz, resident blond and perennial California girl actress, made my heart sink. Is that what our culture really thinks about marriage? Are people viewing the institution of marriage as a dying, archaic expression that is unnecessary for true commitment?

After having a few conversations with classmates from my grad program (all of which are in "committed" and long term relationships - most living together), I realize that the world does view marriage as...irrelevant. What's the point when most people get divorced anyway?

What has become of marriage? When did the vows of "until death do us part" became more of a loose suggestion or overly sentimental pledge?

And look, Diaz, you're entitled to your opinion but I hope you know that thousands, millions of young girls and women may be reading your words. These opinions (that may arguably be stated out of jaded, bitter, or even tired feelings) are shaping today's and our future's culture.

I understand, after talking with my classmates and pondering it myself, why the institution of marriage is dissolving. I think the concept of marriage has changed from how it was originally designed. Marriage was/is the union of two people, a pledge before God and witnesses to live their lives together. "From this day forth, your life is just as important if not more important than my own". "God has put you in my life and just as God has shown me grace and continues to love and want a relationship with me, I will do the same with you".

Without these thoughts and these beliefs as the driving force behind marriage - there is no point. It is relegated to being an overly sentimental and cliched series of events. White dress? Check. Crying ring bearer? Check. Embarrassing garter retrieval? Check.

But there's more. Oh so much more. I could write 389 more paragraphs, but I'll close for now with the thought that it makes me sad. The thought that marriage is a useless expression of emotion is evidence of the fall. We've been inoculated from being moved by the beauty of one person committing to another, saying that God is good and redemption is possible.

soapbox

Jon and Kate Gosselin (do you hear me?) you NEED to stop giving interviews. For crying out loud people, if these are such big issues that are obviously personal - do you need to inform the rest of America? For the love of having a million children to care for, please stop talking to the press and get your lives together behind closed doors. Please and thank you.

upside down

This will only be a mild rant. I had a brief conversation today about the entertainment industry. I'll be the first to admit that I love movies. I like celebrities. The whole glitz and glamour of the Hollywood lifestyle is fascinating to me. Driving an Aston Martin and owning a dozen homes across the globe has an appealing draw to it, I suppose. When I really think about it though, it seems ridiculous. Is it really necessary to own that much...stuff?

Reese Witherspoon tops the list of highest paid actress. She makes 10 to 15 million dollars per film. Yes, 10 to 15 million. I hear that number and I'm like, okay. And then I really try to wrap my mind around a salary that's in the millions. I can't. No wonder she buys jewelry and bags that cost thousands a pop.

Why are actors and actresses paid so much? I realize they are talented. They can convey a story, emotion, message in a way that can move an audience. I might and I mean might understand a salary of 500,000 a film. That's a lot of money especially when you add endorsements, other films, and the jewelry/clothes and other things that are just given to them. But in the millions?

Why are they paid so much and educators so little? I think this is a question that I may never figure out.